I think the reason that I want to do theory instead of experiment, HET instead of condensed matter physics is the avoidance of learning the reality. But I am wrong. Physics is a subject matter of reality.

In painting, I found the reality is grey with different hues. And it’s elegant. While the commercial photographers and cartoonist use really bright colors to cheat stupid people, to have power over the audience. They are lies. And they don’t seem to be elegant at all. Even if they spend much much much effort on their lie, it’s still a lie and will not be memorized by history.

I don’t want to be a lier in painting any more.

And I don’t want to be a lier in my life any more.

Let’s deal with different and elegant and interesting grays in life.

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我认为向申请risd得研究生不是一时冲动，因为那么多天过去了，每天早上起来的时候，我的想法仍然没有改变。Myken告诉我RISD不仅仅会教育学生怎么画画，还会教育学生怎么样成为一个可以养活自己的gallery artist。逃避现实是幼稚的表现，尽管有的是条件让我逃避现实，但是待在迪士尼乐园里没有什么意思，那个世界并不高雅。现在想做的是找到一个真正自己可以做好的方向去做。理论还是实验无所谓，高能还是凝聚态无所谓。